


You Are Not Going To Buy Disney!

by sophoklesworld



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: International Fanworks Day 2016, M/M, Spoilers, Spoilers: Star Wars The Force Awakens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-05-20 14:03:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6009997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sophoklesworld/pseuds/sophoklesworld
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>“Are we — are we seriously considering owning part of the next Star Wars Episode as the Avengers Initiative? Seriously?” Clint’s mouth hung open.</em>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>  <em>“Yeah, I mean, if talking and deals don’t work — I can still buy the company.”</em><br/>“Tony, you are not gonna buy Disney.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Are Not Going To Buy Disney!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [prismalicht](https://archiveofourown.org/users/prismalicht/gifts), [Shadowcat221b](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowcat221b/gifts).



> This is inspired by my lovely friends Shadowcat221b and bunteslicht. I mean, basically everything Star Wars related inspired this, so...
> 
> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> Happy International Fanworks Day! :)

* * *

 

Tony had sent an SOS on their Avenger issued cell phones while everyone was getting ready for the Star Wars: The Force Awakens premiere.

As soon as Steve read Tony’s name on his phone, he grabbed his shield and ran.

Just as he was out of the room, he heard Clint cursing from behind, followed by Thor’s booming steps.

“We’re gonna miss the fucking premiere.” Clint’s annoyance was supported by Nat’s “ _Da_.”

She only ever spoke Russian when she was really angry.

On his phone, Steve tracked Tony’s position to the theatre of the tower, of all places.

 

He crashed through the door and came to a stumbling halt, the rest of his team following shortly after.

Tony stood in front of the large screen. There was no apparent threat.

 

“Tony, what’s wrong?” Steve asked, worried.

 

Tony grinned, opened his arms and said “Tada!”

 

Clint was the first to speak.  
“What the fuck, Stark? Is this a joke. We’re gonna miss the premiere.”

“Well”, Tony smirked, “that doesn’t matter, because we’re not going.”

“Excuse me.” Clint said, deadpan.

“What are you speaking of, Tony? Of course we are going to watch the premiere.” Thor said confused but also a little threatening.

“No, we’re not.”

When Clint moved, no one stopped him. Not even Steve, because truth be told, even he was really excited about the new Star Wars movie.

“What the fuck do you mean, we’re not going, Stark?” Clint grabbed one of the bowls with popcorn, that sat in the last row of seats. “You sent a fucking SOS-”, he yelled, and threw the bowl. “-to tell us-” Steve winced in sympathy, when Tony managed, to barely evade the bowl but not the content.

“- that you don’t wanna fucking go-” Clint took another bowl and got ready to throw it “-for whatever ridiculous reason! And tell us, not to go either?!”

Steve put her hand on Clint’s arm, just as he got ready to throw the second bowl. Natasha snarled at him — which, really, it showed just how much Steve’s team wanted to watch this movie — but didn’t move.

Even Bruce was looking at Tony with anger and disappointment in his face. Phil seemed indifferent as always, the only thing giving him away were his arms crossed over his chest.

Steve turned back around, to look at Tony, who was still grinning like an idiot.  
“Explain.” Steve said, and his voice was colder than he thought it would be.

Tony only wavered a little.

“Well, I was asking you to come here, because we are going to watch Star Wars Episode VII.”

After a beat of silence, Natasha said, in a voice that suggested Tony was the greatest idiot on this planet, “Exactly. And therefore we need to go to the theatre _ASAP_!”

“What you didn’t put in the equation, Natasha, is that you already _are_ in a theatre.” Tony explained, a wide smile on his face and a glint in his eyes, as he was met with a confused silence once again.

 

When it dawned on Steve, what Tony implied with that, he gaped at his boyfriend. Thor let out a disbelieving “No!” and Clint flat out _squealed_ like the fangirl he was.

“Are you saying, we are watching the premiere in here? Together? Alone?” Phil sounded a little breathless which was more emotion Tony got out of him on a daily basis.

“Yep”, Tony grinned.

“Whoa.”

Bruce shook his head. “You’re incredible.” He accepted his fate and was the first to sit down and make himself comfortable.

Tony laughed, when Clint jumped down the stairs to hug him, not minding the popcorn lying on the floor.

Nat shrugged and sat down next to Bruce with a grin. She secured herself one of the bowls of popcorn and put up her feet.

Steve still couldn’t believe, what Tony had managed. He didn’t dare asking. He didn’t want to know which unconventional methods Tony might have used, because then he wouldn’t be able to really enjoy the movie anymore.

Instead, when Clint leapt past Steve to get a good place in Phil’s lap, and Tony trailed after him, Steve pulled Tony close.

“You’re incredible”, he said against Tony’s mouth between two kisses.  
“I know. Everything for my family. Now, lets sit down. Movie’s gonna start soon! It’s timed with the premiere downtown.”

Steve wasn’t sure if Tony or Clint were the most excited about the movie. Both acted like little children. It was endearing.

“This is gonna get so good, oh my god!”

“Clint, if you keep moving around on my lap all night you are welcome to spend the time on the floor instead.”

“Phiiiiiil! Nooo! What do you think, does Leia have a light saber? In the books she’s a jedi, just like Luke. The trailer doesn’t even give away if she’s gonna be in there.”

“I hope they have a badass female lead.” Natasha said. “What if she’s like Anakin? Totally good with mechanics and ships?”

“God, yes. Let her fly the Falcon like Han does! And please, a lot of light saber fights.” Tony added.

“The mighty women shall fight with those glowing swords of great heroes.” Thor agreed.

“As long as the Resistance is doing the right thing”, Steve said, “and not working for the best of few, like in those stupid Batman movies.”

“Hey, take that back! Batman is the _best_!” Tony said.

“You just say that because he has money and you identify with him.” Clint grinned at Tony, who threw a handful of popcorn at him, for good measure.

“Can you please be quiet now?”, Bruce seemed calm, but his eyes showed his excitement. “The movie is about to start.”

 

Indeed, the screen turned white and a commercial started.

“Really, Tony?”, they all said in a chorus.

Tony grinned. “What, don’t wanna have the cinema flair?”  
“We could've had that at the cinema, if you had let us go there.” Natasha helpfully supplied.

“Relax, its just one or two commercials, but I told JARVIS to start a little earlier, we don’t wanna miss anything, do we?”

The grumbling was agreement enough.

 

Soon after, the text rolled over the screen.

 

 

When Rey first appeared, Tony said, “Nat, there you have your strong female lead.”

She grinned. “Let’s see what she got.”

  
“They are gay for each other.” Said Clint about Finn and Poe laughing on screen.

Tony agreed loudly, and Steve had to admit he was right.

 

On the screen, Finn persistently held onto Rey’s hand.

The comments of the Avengers didn’t subside.

“God, this is gonna be a love story.”

“No, it’s not, Clint. I want them to be like Steve and me.”

“You mean like bestest friends with benefits?” Tony asked, his eyebrows raised. Natasha looked him dead in the eye but didn’t say anything.

“What? I am still convinced that you two had it going on, and you can’t convince me otherwise.”

“Tony, I never slept with your boyfriend.” After a moment consideration, Natasha smirked at Tony. “We kissed, though.”

Tony had made the mistake of taking a gulp of his beer, while talking to Natasha — it was on his “Not-To-Do”-List which he had once again managed to ignore. Now he was choking on it.

Steve gently slapped his back, to help him breathe.

“You _what_?” Tony asked incredulously and turned to Steve accusingly, feigning offense.

“It was _once_. One kiss.” Steve emphasized. “It was to keep HYDRA off our back.”

“Yeah, right.” Tony snorted and turned back to the screen.

“Nat is right, though”, Clint got back to the important stuff — Star Wars. “They shouldn't put Rey and Finn into one of those gender normative relationships, it would be — is that the _Millennium Falcon they are gonna take there?_ Hell yeah!”

With that they were captivated by the movie again until Clint suggested, “Petition to rebuild the Quinjet in the form of the _Falcon_.”

“Signed.” Too many of his teammates gave their blessing with this one simple word. Steve looked over to Phil, who was the only one (apart from Steve) that had stayed silent. Steve knew that either Clint was gonna convince Phil of this later, or Phil would tell Fury about this. This would mean, they were really gonna build a Falcon, one way or the other, because if Fury said ‘No’, Tony would build it, just to spite him.

 

From then on, it was mostly quite because everyone was in awe about the movie. There were guesses in-between about what would happen, apart from that, only the occasional “God, I love that movie.” was heard.

 

 

 

 

On screen, Finn spotted Poe the exact moment Poe spotted Finn.

The Avengers stayed silent but when the two embraced each other, Steve’s arm tightened around Tony’s waist. They had had too many close calls in the last couple of weeks and the scene felt way too familiar.

Giggling, and pointing at the screen, Natasha gave in to her inner fangirl, when Poe told Finn to keep the jacket because “ _it suits you._ ”

“Did he just-”, Tony started, turning around to stare at Steve, only to swivel right back so he wouldn’t miss what happened on screen. “Did he just _check out a Stormtrooper_?”

“Ex-stormtrooper”, Nat corrected. “He so did!”

“They cannot possibly deny the subtext.” Clint said.

“That’s what you said about BBC Sherlock and John, too.” Phil reminded, gently. “And Moffat still managed to deny it.”

“But they _are so in love_! Sherlock would give _everything_ for John! And the other way around, too.”

Clint was full on whining.

“Guys, back to the movie?” Bruce suggested.

Raising his hands in apology, Clint turned back to the screen.

 

After a while Phil said, “You’re right, though. How they always deny it is beyond me. Homophobic and bigoted assholes.”

Tony chuckled, but Steve shushed them — especially Tony, though, because this particular shush implied ‘no sex’, which was just _rude_. But it was silent for a while, then.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Silence fell over the room when the movie was over until Tony breathed, low and shocked, “ _They killed off Han Solo_.”

“Assholes.” Phil agreed with feeling. There had been a lot of shocked noises and a lot of angry curses when Kylo Ren killed his father.

 

After another short pause, Natasha asked, “Do you think they’ll let Finn wake up before or during the next movie?”

“Dunno, but I hope it’s on screen and Poe is there when he does. For love!” Clint bumped his fist in the air.

“I think it would be actually a great thing to introduce them in a gay relationship. The picture of the LGBTQ+ community needs to change. And a movie like this — with so much marketing and such a huge fandom — would be rather good for it.”

“Yeah, Steve”, Tony nudged his shoulder, “but remember, that people like J. J. Abrams have a lot to loose, too, if they did that. A lot of bad publicity — sadly. A lot of good, too, sure. But they are afraid of the homophobes of this world. So much they start acting like homophobes even though they aren’t necessarily all that bad.”  
“Can we not talk to them? Like, I don’t know, the Avengers Initiative supporting LGBTQ+ and their rights, and work with them together?”

Tony stared at him as well as everyone in the room.

“What?”, Steve asked defiantly.

“You are so _sexy_ when you suggest threatening people into something. Let’s go have sex right now!”

Steve rolled his eyes. “I mean it. No threats. Just — talk and maybe work something out. If we go there as the Initiative, tell them we’d like them to help us make a point or something…”  
“You know, this might actually work. I mean, not without the right amount of money — but money I have —, and maybe we could get a deal with Abrams. Steve, you’re _genius._ I would’ve gone for bribery or threat but that might just work — and if we put some money in there, it’ll definitely be easier.”

  
“Are we — are we seriously considering owning part of the next Star Wars Episode as the Avengers Initiative just so there’s gonna be a love story between Finn and Poe? Seriously?” Clint’s mouth hung open.

 

“Yeah, I mean, if talking and deals don’t work — I can still buy the company.”

“Tony, you are _not_ gonna buy _Disney_.”

“But Steve! I think we agreed on Finn and Poe as a couple — how are we gonna call ‘em anyway? Nat? You always have those names, I mean, you call Steve ’n me ‘Stony’ — can you-”

“Stormpilot?” Natasha suggested.

“Yes, great! So, we already decided we are Team Stormpilot. Now we gonna punch this through. If it means buying _Disney,_ well.”  
“Under no circumstances are we — or you — going to buy _Disney_.”

Tony knew a lost cause when he saw one. Steve used his Captain voice. There wasn’t anything Tony could do to win this discussion (now; maybe later though, when they were alone), so he compromised.

“Well, we can at least talk to J. J. Abrams. We’re the Avengers Initiative, he can’t possibly turn down a meeting. I’ll call Pepper in the morning to set up an appointment, alright?” His eyes were on Steve, when he said it but in his peripheral vision, he saw Clint and Nat nod emphatically.

“Alright?” Tony prompted again, when Steve kept quiet.

“Alright.”

Steve shook his head, like he knew he made a mistake agreeing, but there was a tiny smile playing around his mouth so he couldn’t be too mad about it.

“Thank you”, Tony said, low and soft and pressed a kiss to the corner of Steve’s mouth. When he looked up into Steve’s eyes again, they were dark and heavy lidded.  
In a soft voice, Tony said, “I wasn’t kidding, you know? It’s really hot when you suggest corruption.”

Steve turned red and ducked his head before he surged in for another kiss.

 

  
“Looks like we got ourselves jobs in the show biz”, Natasha smirked when she stood up.

“Yeah, looks like.” Tony sighed, between kisses. The team left Steve and Tony to their make out session and quickly exited the room, which Tony was only aware of because of the dying laughter and disgusted choking noises (Tony would get back at Clint for that, later).

For now he had better things to do, though — like kissing Steve. Kissing Steve was one of his favorite pastimes.

Steve ended up hot and heavy above Tony. His mouth turned demanding and moved along Tony’s jaw and temple.

“I love you”, Tony murmured against Steve’s collarbone.

Steve pulled back a little and replied with a rough and serious voice. “I love you, too.”

He seemed to consider a moment before he said, smirk on his face “Still not going to allow you to buy _Disney_.”  
Tony cursed, as Steve pushed back, laughing. He grabbed the last two empty popcorn bowls still sitting on the floor, and made his way towards the door, Tony still cursing behind him.  
“Get back here, Steve! How did you even know I was gonna ask that? Get back! You can’t leave me here like this. Steve’s that’s ridiculous. Please!” He was whining and he knew it but he couldn’t care less. He gestured at the very obvious bulge in his pants. “Steve, you have unfinished business down here. Come back!”

Steve only laughed.

“You know, you could just come to bed with me”, he suggested.

“Fuck you, Steve. I wanted to have a nice evening with you, but you choose to leave _this_ behind. Tough luck, buddy, I won’t need your help with this then, anymore.” Tony struggled to get up of the couch. “And I’m gonna keep your sweater!” He called after Steve, like an afterthought, pulling the sweater Steve had discarded during the movie over his head.

Steve appeared back in the doorway, eyes dark and a broad smile still on his face. His voice, when he talked, did _things_ to Tony and judging by the glimmer in his eyes, he knew that full well.

“Keep it. It suits you.”

Tony gulped. He didn’t know whether to glare at Steve for this — this _fucking massive asshole move_ — but there wasn’t any resistance left in him. All he could do was scramble after a laughing Steve, all the while staring at his ass.

* * *

 


End file.
